John has a nightmare and Sherlock is awkward about hugs. 

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Stranger: John awakes screaming, shaking and covered in his own, cool sweat after another one of his nightmares. He lies in his room, his face buried in his hands and sobs quietly as images of his war past bombard his mind, unaware that Sherlock is at the foot of his bed. His mind flashes to the time he was captured and tortured, something only his therapist knows about.

You: Sherlock draws closer to John, aiming to crouch by his head and ask him if he is okay. He is oblivious to the images running through his flatmate’s mind.

Stranger: John hears a sound next to him. In his slightly altered, PTSD state he freaks out, assuming it to be an enemy. In a second, he launches him self at the intruder and tackles them to the floor, shaking and with eyes wide with fear. “Why can’t you leave me alone you sick bastard?! You’ve killed the others why do you still have me here?!” John shouted.

You: Sherlock looks up with wide eyes at the man who had tackled him to the floor so suddenly. He finds his voice in a bit and tries to call out to the man “Joh-“

Stranger: ”Shut up! Just kill me or let me go! Why am I still here? I’m not going to tell you anything, just stop…” John said, at first shouting before gradually sounding defeated, loosening his grip on the other man.

You: Sherlock acted quick as the initial shock passed and he realized what was going on. He grasped John’s forearms and sat up with him in his lap. He tightened his hold and forced the other man to look at him in the face. “Snap out of it!” HE said with a loud voice, shaking the man a bit.

Stranger: At first John strugged against the grip, but in an instant, his eyes cleared and he stared at Sherlock, confused and painfully aware of the fact that there were a few tears sliding down his cheek. “Sh…Sherlock? What…Are you alright?” John said worriedly, looking at Sherlock with a concerned look on his face as he searched his friend for injuries.

Stranger: *struggled

You: ((is Sherlock the one crying or John?))

Stranger: ((Oh, sorry, John))

You: ((’s ok just wanted to confirm ^^))

Stranger: ((No worries. Sorry, I just realised myself how unclear that was :/))

You: ((^^ np))

You: Sherlock shook his head and looked at John’s face, gaze lingering on the tears for a bit. “I’m fine. But you obviously are not.” He paused and locked eyes with John. “Nightmare, I presume.”

Stranger: John nodded as he moved back from Sherlock, sitting with his back against the wall as he wiped the tears from his eyes and tucked his knees up to his chest, resting his head on them. “I’m sorry if I woke you. I’m even more sorry if I hurt you,” John said quietly.

You: Sherlock stood up and dusted his jacket. “No harm done.” He turned to leave the room but then he looked at John a last time and changed his mind. He had next to no expertise in consoling a distraught person but he couldn’t just leave his friend in this state. So he walked back and sat on the bad and watched John silently for a while. What would most people do in this situation…he would most likely say something wrong so …oh right…let him talk. “Want to talk about it?” The question sounded absurd coming from his mouth.

You: ((bed*))

Stranger: John actually raised his head and looked at Sherlock, a frown on his face. Is Sherlock offering to help him? Maybe John was still dreaming. “You…you want to know?” John asked as he continued to sit and tremble against the wall.

You: Sherlock thought ‘Do I? I have better things to do then have a chat with John’ but it probably wasn’t what the other man wanted to hear. So Sherlock nodded awkwardly.

Stranger: John continued to frown but then decided to just come out and say it, dispite Sherlock’s current awkward state. “I was captured during a fire fight. They took me and 3 others to a camp and tortured us. They killed each one of my friends by slitting their throats right in front of me so that I was drenched in their blood. I continued to not tell them anything. They tied me to a table and cut and burned me, but still I refused. I didn’t care anymore. It didn’t matter to me if I lived or died. One day, during one of their torture sessions, I snapped and I grabbed the nearest gun to me and opened fire. I killed every single one of them,” John said, shaking violently now. He lifted up his shirt and showed Sherlock the scars and burns on his skin.

You: Sherlock listened. He was busy adding all these to his mind palace. Then he saw the scars. They were most…interesting. Something he hadn’t known about John before. And they did look …painful. He realized he was expected to say something. “I’m sorry.” he said. He didn’t know what else to do.

Stranger: John nodded. He could tell Sherlock was way out of his depth here and he could also see that he was intrigued with the story and the scars. He was surprised at how easy it was to tell Sherlock all of this. But what he said was hardest of all. “There’s something else, Sherlock. The worst part of all…I took off their masks, after I’d killed them…Most of them couldn’t have been much older than fourteen. I killed fucking CHILDREN!” John said as he buried his head in shame at his actions.

You: Sherlock forced out something he hoped sounded….comforting. “It was war. And ….you had no other choice. Besides…age don’t matter …it doesn’t necessarily mean someone is innocent or have more right to live.”

Stranger: John just looked up at Sherlock. “You think it was meritted? Me killing children because I valued my life above theirs? They could still be alive now. But instead, I pumped their bodies full of lead and recieved a medal from the government,” John said, his voice thick with disgust.

You: ”John. What’s done is done. You shouldn’t take it so….personally I believe. You were carrying out orders.”

Stranger: John shook his head. “No, I wasn’t. I was by myself. We’d been captured, the others were all killed infront of me. I was acting on my own feelings. You don’t understand, do you? No, I forgot, you don’t have emotions or a moral compass. That stuff doesn’t matter. It’s transport, I believe you said,” John replied bitterly. He stood up and before he could act, he punched the wall hard, causing his knuckles to sear with pain. He looked back at Sherlock and instantly felt horrible. “Sherlock…I’m sorry. I’m so, so sorry,” John said quietly. Without thinking he moved over to Sherlock and hugged him tightly, burying his face in his chest as he began to sob. “I’m sorry,” he said repeatedly.

You: Sherlock tried to pull back at first, he hadn’t anticipated /this/ at all. But pulling back might come off as rejection so he let John hug him, he moved his arms as if to hug back but changed his mind half way and let hem fall back on to the bed. “It is okay…fine.” He muttered.

You: ((them* as in arms…not them as in John and him XD))

Stranger: ((Hehe, all good, I got that :P ))

Stranger: ”It’s n-not. It’s n-not fine,” John said between sobs. “I shouldn’t have s-said that. I shouldn’t b-be like this. Like you said, it’s in the p-past. I sh-should be over it,” John muttered.

You: ”You are…stressed. That’s understandable.” Sherlock pursed his lips, John’s tears were seeping through his shirt.

Stranger: John nodded. He soon realised how he must be looking. Instantly, his military training kicked in. He suddenly stood up and away from Sherlock, straightened himself and stood stiff, hardening his eyes as he stopped sobbing and repressed his dispair. “I’m sorry, Sherlock. I’m sorry to do this too you,” he said as he looked at his friend on the bed.

Stranger: *to

You: ”You haven’t done a thing. Stop apologizing, it’s most obtrusive.”

Stranger: ”I’m sorry,” John said stiffly, wincing as he realised he’d apologised again. “I’m…You know what I mean. Would you like some tea?”

You: ”Its the middle of the night. You should go back to sleep.” Sherlock said as he stood up and made to leave the room. He was feeling most…awkward.

You: ((brb))

Stranger: John shook his head. “I um…I don’t think I’ll be getting to sleep again tonight,” he admitted quietly. He sat back on his bed. “Good night, Sherlock. Thank you for…everything. I know it made you uncomfortable. But I appreciate that you still tried to help me,” John said as he returned to burying his head into his hands.

Stranger: ((ok :) ))

Stranger: ((Dinner…I’ll be back quick :) Incase we disconnect, my Tumblr is breatheinthemusic. You don’t need to follow (although you can if you wish :P ) it’s just so we can continue if you’d like to :) ))

You: ((back I went to get food too XD and yeah I’ll wait))

You: Sherlock nodded. “Shouldn’t therapy help with …this kind of situations?”

Stranger: ((Back :) Thanks for waiting :D ))

You: ((no problemo ^^))

Stranger: John shook his head. “I stopped going, remember? Therapy is no help,” John replied, a little sadly.

You: ”You just need someone more adequate for the job.”

Stranger: John allowed himself a smile. “Well, to be honest, you were far better and easier to talk to.”

You: Sherlock raised his brows in surprise. How was that so? He had no idea what he was doing right. “Is that so?”

Stranger: ”Oh yeah,” John said, lifting his head and looking earnestly at his friend.

You: ”Okay.” He replied. “I’ll …put the kettle on.” and he slipped out of the room.

Stranger: John frowned. He followed Sherlock out of the room, his legs slighty weak as he moved. “Wait? What happened to ‘It’s the middle of the night’?” John asked as he met Sherlock downstairs, leaning against the table in the kitchen to stop his legs from trembling.

You: ”You said you couldn’t sleep again. So …tea.”

Stranger: ”What about you?” John said, looking at Sherlock slightly concerned. “You look tired.”

You: ”I’m fine. I can go for another night without sleep.” He replied without turning his back, busy with preparing the tea cups.

Stranger: John raised an eyebrow as he moved towards Sherlock. “At least let me do that. Consider it my thanks for what you’ve done tonight,” John said, insistantly.

You: Sherlock blinked, straightened his back and pulled away from the counter, making space for John.

Stranger: John nodded. “Thank you,” he said as he took over from Sherlock. He set to work, making the tea. As he poured the milk, he caught a glimpse of his injured hand. He finished making the tea, stepping aside so Sherlock could get his cup, and went to the freezer, wrapping some ice in a tea towel and applying it to his hand. “I’m such an idiot,” he stated.

You: ”Yes. You are.” Sherlock muttered before sipping his tea. “But you make good tea.”

You: He smiled, an attempt at lifting the mood.

Stranger: John smiled in response. “At least that’s one thing I can do,” he said lightly. He balanced the ice on his hand as he carried his tea over to the loungeroom.

You: ”Don’t underestimate yourself.” Sherlock chuckled. “The is really important.”

You: ((Tea*)

You: ((that was a fail sorry XD))

Stranger: ((Haha, all good, we all do it. I once meant to say ‘John felt as though the wind had been knocked out of him’ but instead I said ‘John felt as though the WINDOW had been knocked out of him’ :P ))

You: ((omg lol ahahahah XD))

Stranger: John chuckled as well. “Yes, I suppose it is,” he said as he sipped his tea and flexed his hand, wincing with a gasp as the action caused him pain. “Thank you again, for everything tonight. I honestly do feel better.”

You: Sherlock rolled his eyes. “He stops apologizing and starts thanking instead. Really John…I got the idea after the first time.”

Stranger: John blushed. “Maybe I shouldn’t say anything then,” he said with a shy smile.

You: ”I think that’s for the best.” He said with a straight face. Then he broke into a smile too. “You’re a good man John Watson. It dreads me to think that you suffer because of the goodness of your heart.”

Stranger: John gave a half-hearted smile as he cast his gaze to the floor. “Well, I don’t know how good my heart is,” he said.

You: ”You have doubts? Why?” Sherlock couldn’t think of a reason why John would think that.

Stranger: John shrugged. “Just, everything that happened, is all,” John said quietly. “I know you told me to get over it and I’m trying but I can still see their faces and all I can think about is what I did. Why would someone with a good heart do that?”

You: ”Someone with a bad heart wouldn’t be bothered by it at all. The fact that you do proves my point.”

Stranger: John looked up at Sherlock. “I guess you’re right. Thank you,” John said as he took another sip of his tea.

You: ”I’m always right.” Sherlock replied smugly.

Stranger: John rolled his eyes. “Of course. How could I forget?” He asked sarcastically.

You: ”How indeed…” Sherlock smirked and flopped down on the couch.

Stranger: John eyed Sherlock. “Sherlock, you know that if there’s anything you’re having trouble with, you can talk to me, right?”

You: He looked up confused “Trouble?”

Stranger: John nodded. “Yeah, trouble. Anything on your mind that you need help with. I want to help you, Sherlock. I want to be someone you can trust.

You: ”I trust you John. However I do not understand…what trouble you’re referring to. I’m perfectly fine.”

Stranger: John smiled. “I don’t mean now, necessarily. I just mean at anytime. If something his troubling you…mentally or emotionally. Or physically, I am a doctor for that matter.”

You: Sherlock nodded, a bit peeved at the sudden turn of the conversation. “Come…sit.” He offered.

Stranger: John nodded and sat down opposite Sherlock. He noticed the slightly annoyed look on his face. “Have I done something wrong?”

You: ”No….you didn’t. I’m just…not used to someone offering…consolation.”

Stranger: John’s face softened. “Oh…I’m sorry to hear that,” John replied, genuinely.

You: He shook his head. “Its fine. I don’t need it anyways. But your trying…its welcome.”

Stranger: John nodded. “Ok, well, just know that I’m here and I won’t think any less of you. You’ll always be incredible,” John said, slightly embarrassed at his word choice.

You: ”Incredible?” Sherlock looked up…that was a new one.

Stranger: John blushed. “Yeah, incredible. You’re incredible, Sherlock. I’ve never met anyone like you.”

You: ”…..thank you.” He flushed a bit. He wasn’t used to being showered in John’s compliments this randomly…he wasn’t even making deductions at the moment.

Stranger: ”Any time,” John said. An awkward silence fell between them. Both men finished their teas and John stood, grabbing his and Sherlock’s cups in one hand as he balanced the ice on his other and headed over to the kitchen.

You: ”You’re too.” Sherlock said almost inaudible.

Stranger: John’s keen ears picked up Sherlock’s words. He nearly dropped the cups in his surprise. He headed back into the lounge room after placing the cups in the sink and sat down before saying “Thank you,” in a voice which was full of surprise.

You: ”Did hugging me help…when you were distressed?” He was already trying to find something to help John.

Stranger: John’s face burned bright red. “I’m sorry. That must have made you really uncomfortable,” John said. “I didn’t even realise what I was doing. But yes, I felt better.”

You: ”Would doing that as you sleep prevent you from having nightmares?”

Stranger: John frowned, assuming he surely heard Sherlock incorrectly. “I’m sorry, what?”

You: ”Would hugging me as you sleep stop the nightmares?” Sherlock asked with a clipped voice.

Stranger: John just stared at Sherlock with his eyes wide open, unsure how to answer. “Have you…No, I don’t think it’d make any difference. If anything, I’d end up hurting you probably.”

You: ”If you say so…” Sherlock pulled his legs up to lounge on the couch. He didn’t say more.

Stranger: John found himself unable to comprehend what had just happened. “You mean you’d actually like me to fall asleep in your arms to prevent me from having a nightmare?”

You: ”It was an idea.” Sherlock retorted.

Stranger: ”Sherlock, most people would definitely not have that as an idea. That’s…incredible,” John exclaimed again as he looked at Sherlock in awe.

You: ”Its simple cause and effect path John. Physical contact seemed to calm you down after your nightmare. Hence I concluded that it might help prevent the nightmares themselves.”

Stranger: ”Logicalise it all you want, Sherlock. It’s still amazing that you would offer to do that for me…I didn’t know you cared that much.”

You: ”I do care for you.” Sherlock remarked neutrally.

Stranger: ”I just didn’t think it was that much, is all,” John replied, a smile spreading across his face.

You: ”You’re worth the effort.”

Stranger: John was amazed. No one had ever said that to him. “Thank you, Sherlock. So much.”

You: ”You’re welcome.” He smiled with a faint blush. He had said too much.

Stranger: John saw the blush the on Sherlock’s face and found himself smiling. “Sherlock?” John asked as he stood. “Can I please try something? Could you please stand up?”

You: Sherlock looked up and hesitated “Why?”

Stranger: ”I just…I want to try something…an experiment, if you will,” John said before noticing the hesitant look in his friend’s eyes. “You don’t have to if you don’t want to,” he said gently.

You: Sherlock saw no harm in participating in an experiment conducted by John. What was the worse thing that could happen. He stood up and looked down at John’s face “…yes?”

Stranger: John slowly and carefully approached Sherlock, not wanting to startle him. He drew closer and hugged the other man tightly. “How does that make you feel?” John asked quietly, waiting to pick up on the slightest reaction.

You: ”A bit claustrophobic…” Sherlock answered truthfully. “But…generally nice I suppose. You’re warm.”

Stranger: John let go of Sherlock at the mention of claustrophobia. “Sorry,” he said gently before stepping back to give him some room. “How often have you been hugged?”

You: ”….a couple of times.” Sherlock answered, he was hugged by his mother and Mycroft when he was a kid. And also Mrs.Hudson…she liked hugging him.

Stranger: John paused in thought. He swore he saw the barest trace of a smile as he seemed to recollect the times he’d been hugged. He went back into the hug, this time motioning for Sherlock to hug him as well. “Does the feeling change if you hug me as well?…I noticed you, up in my room, you went to hug me but decided against it.”

You: ”I don’t know how to decide when to let go…that is why I usually don’t hug back.” He said looking down at John.

Stranger: John broke the hug apart and looked up at Sherlock. He personally thought Sherlock’s hug was perfect. “You’ll do fine, Sherlock. The other person will let you know when it’s time to stop,” he said reassuringly.

You: ((sorry if I’m a bit slow on the reply))

Stranger: ((It’s fine :) ))

You: ((I’m writing something about diabetes so I’m a bit distracted))

You: (( school related stuff sorry))

Stranger: ((Haha, it’s fine…I’m watching paramedic videos on YouTube :P ))

You: ((lol that’s good XD I’m lucky I’m knowledged in the topic though….otherwise I would have to research….curse of being a med student bloobloobloo))

You: ”Oh…that’s…its okay then. I didn’t know that.”

Stranger: ((Med student? That’s awesome! I’m hoping to be a paramedic when I graduate high school in November :P I’ll be you soon haha :P ))

Stranger: John nodded. “You’re Sherlock Holmes. I can’t believe I just taught Sherlock Holmes something,” John said with a smile.

You: ((:DD that’s awesome too!! Good luck :3))

Stranger: ((You too! :D ))

You: Sherlock bent a bit lower and he initiated a hug this time. This hug was tighter and felt better.

Stranger: John was shocked. Was Sherlock hugging him? He hugged Sherlock back, equalling the tightness and enjoying how warm Sherlock felt around him.

You: ”Is this okay?” He asked, a bit hesitant.

Stranger: John nodded. “Of course. This is good,” John said as he stood with Sherlock in the middle of the flat.

Stranger: ((brb))

Stranger: ((back :) ))

You: Sherlock placed his chin over John’s head. He has seen this on a photograph. It seemed appropriate.

Stranger: John was surprised at Sherlock’s action. “You’re a natural,” he said lightly.

You: Sherlock smiled. It was a lucky guess. “Do we have to kiss now?” He asked, unsure. It was what people do isn’t it? Hug and kiss?…or was it the other way around…has he made a mistake?

Stranger: John broke apart from Sherlock. “Woah, hold your horses there mate. Is there something you want to tell me?”

You: Sherlock looked down and blinked like an over grown labrador who had just woken up. “No…?”

Stranger: John shifted uncomfortably. “It’s just that…well…generally, people only hug and kiss when they’re…in love…”

You: ”…oh…” Sherlock’s face went red. He had a gap in his knowledge then…oh dear.

Stranger: John smiled at Sherlock’s red face. “It’s fine, really. The hug was perfect.” John paused. Something was rising in his chest. He didn’t know what. Seeming to loose control, John moved back over to Sherlock and kissed him. He stood back, his own heart racing. “H-how was that? From a purely experiemental view, of course,” John said, feeling incredibly awkward all of a sudden.

You: ”…you kissed me…” Sherlock looked down. “…but you said..” He was most confused. He didn’t like being confused.

Stranger: John repeated the question. “How did it make you feel? Other than confused, of course,” John said. Oh God, what had he done? Why the hell had he just done that?

You: ”…I have really no reference to compare it to.” He said sheepishly.”It was nice I suppose.”

Stranger: John frowned. “You’ve never been kissed before?

Stranger: *”

You: ”No.” Sherlock said. “Is that a bad thing?”

Stranger: ”It’s not bad…it’s more…sad, I guess,” John said, although he wasn’t totally surprised. Sherlock didn’t seem the romantic type.

You: Sherlock’s face hardened. “I see.” He didn’t like seeing John pitying him.

Stranger: John saw Sherlock’s face harden and instantly felt bad. “I didn’t mean to make you uncomfortable…maybe I should just leave the experimenting to you,” John said. He couldn’t stop thinking about the kiss and the hug. They were both very good.

You: Sherlock stared down a bit more than twirled around to flop on the couch , ignoring John. He did like the hug…and the kiss. He wanted to do it again, it was something new after all! But it was clear that John had done it out of the goodness of his heart.

Stranger: John sat down on the armchair behind him and put the ice back on his hand. He didn’t think anything was broken. Just badly bruised. He sat a while longer before standing. “I should go back upstairs. I’m sorry to have disturbed you at such a late hour. Thank you again for listening to me,” John said quietly.

You: Sherlock shrugged his shoulders in a motion that acknowledges John’s words.

Stranger: John stood on the spot and nodded. “Right…well, good night, Sherlock,” he said before turning around and heading back upstairs to his room, figuring it was best to leave Sherlock to his thoughts.

You: Sherlock waited for a while and thought. He made up his mind. Then he stood up from the couch and went to John’s room. He slipped into the bed determinedly and hastily wrapped his arms around the other man and remarked “I don’t care if you hurt me.”

Stranger: John was considering resisting but he decided against it. He smiled brightly. “Thank you, Sherlock.”

You: He nodded and started watching John.

Stranger: ((Sorry, is Sherlock hugging John from behind?))

You: ((…first I thought that…then I changed my mind…but now…yes YES he is hugging him from behind…go with it…please XD))

Stranger: ((Cool, thanks :) ))

Stranger: John lay in the bed, feeling Sherlock’s arms around him and his warm body chest pressed to his back. It gave John odd feelings. Did he feel /this way/ about Sherlock? He brought his uninjured hand up and lightly stroked one of Sherlock’s arms.

You: Sherlock tightened his hold, pulling John closer. “I think…hugging is good after all. I can…get used to this.”

Stranger: ”You do, do you?” John said with a smile as he grabbed one of Sherlock’s hands and kissed it gently. “How about that?”

You: Sherlock blinked at the odd kiss. “It feels nice. …you..” he paused not sure how to continue. “You feel nice. Like this.”

Stranger: John smiled. “You feel brilliant, like this. You give incredible hugs,” John said as he returned to stroking Sherlock’s arm.

You: ”…I have a good teacher.” He said and smiled even though John couldn’t see it.

Stranger: ”I don’t think I’ll get used to the fact that I taught Sherlock Holmes something,” John said. He turned around so that he was facing Sherlock and lifted his head, planting a kiss on Sherlock’s soft lips.

You: ((dear God have you seen this: http://i259.photobucket.com/albums/hh301/MikuriPuri/GIF/angstgif.gif))

You: ”Again…” Sherlock mused. “You did it again…does this mean we are people in love?”

Stranger: ((Fuck you.))

Stranger: ((:P ))

You: ((I’m so sorry…but its good eh? XD))

Stranger: ((Yes, really good! Fuck, I require season three and I require it here and I require it now! ))

You: ((I feel you so much right now))

Stranger: John looked at Sherlock. “Sherlock, right now, how do you feel?”

Stranger: ((Ugh, tell me about it…it’s cruel))

You: ”I feel…good.” He pursed his lips. ‘Good’ was such a mediocre term for him to use. “I feel…delighted…content.”

Stranger: John paused. He kissed Sherlock again, this time more passionately. “Now?”

You: ”I…” he looked down and licked his lips. “….aroused?”

Stranger: John looked down also and then back up at Sherlock. “Yes, I’d say so. Good deduction,” John answered with a cheeky grin.

You: ”It wasn’t a-” then he realizes John is teasing him and smiles. “…-idiot.”

Stranger: ((Sorry, this is awkward but I have to go now…right when this is picking up…sorry. This has been fun, thanks :) ))

You: ((its okay hun I have to go too…lesson starting in 10 mins :(())

You: ((liked RPing with ya ;)))

Stranger: ((Oh, well, good luck in med school :) ))

You: ((thanks! Good luck in getting in med school XD))

Stranger: (( :D ))